23 Mar

Most of us are not ok with being undressed in front of other people. That is entirely understandable. Memories of middle school gym class come back to my mind, or the countless youth trips I’ve taken. Even as an adult, I don’t want to bear too much skin.

If you were raised with a certain standard of modesty, it might be harder for you to make the switch to being sexy in the bedroom….and even more so…naked! At the beginning of your relationship, being shy or timid about getting undressed in front of your spouse is to be expected. Over time, the hope and goal would be to feel more comfortable with your spouse without clothes on.

Here are a few things you can do to feel more comfortable naked.

Spend Time Naked When No One is Around

I know this might sound weird, but before you can get comfortable with someone else, you have to get comfortable with yourself. Sure, you may have children that barge in on you and make it hard to have any privacy. If that is you, then it is time to start setting some boundaries for them. There is nothing wrong with teaching your kids or spouse to knock before they come into the bathroom. And…install a lock!

After you step out of the shower in the morning, do other parts of your morning routine before you get dressed. In the winter, this might be a bit more difficult if your bathroom is cold. Turn up the heat before you get in the shower.

If walking around naked after your shower isn’t the best time, then find a time that works for you. There are times in the day in which you will take off your clothing before putting on your other clothes. Take your time before getting dressed.

Look At Yourself in the Mirror With Nothing On

Gasp! I just said the unthinkable, didn’t I? If you want to get comfortable with your body, you must not ignore it. Don’t avoid mirrors at all costs, embrace them. It is not weird to look at yourself in the mirror while you are naked or in seductive clothing. It is no different than making sure you look ok in the outfit you just put on.

When you look at yourself in the mirror, don’t be overly critical of yourself. Just try to see yourself through your spouse’s eyes for a minute. What features do they tell you that they love about your body? Look at those features and try to understand why they feel that way.

Stop Believing What Social Media Says is Beautiful

Seriously, stop believing what the marketing companies and social media say is beautiful. We are no longer in the dark when it comes to filters. You will NEVER see an unedited picture of a person on a billboard, website, magazine cover, or hardly Instagram. It makes it very easy to think everyone else is much hotter than you are.

Do you know why so many people use filters when they are on social media? Because they feel like they have to measure up. I’ve seen a growing movement where more people are showing themselves posing and then relaxing. I really hope the trend continues because it dispels this belief that men and women shouldn’t have rolls, stomachs, or any body fat at all.

Instead of trying to shove your body into the picture-perfect world of marketing campaigns that tell you all people look a certain way, be who you are. When you redefine what you believe to be beautiful, you will see yourself in a different light.

Believe What The People Who Love You Say Instead

Does your husband or wife tell you all the time that they find you attractive and sexy? If so, believe them! What about your mom, your friend, a family member? Listen to the people in your life that care about you. Just a disclaimer here, if you’re in a relationship where the person is putting your body down, that’s not ok, and it’s time for an intervention.

It’s important to embrace that as you get older, you’re not going to look the same as you did when you first got married. I understand the hesitation you may feel stripping down as you age. However, you are more than just one thing to your spouse. You are an entire person, not just a figure or shape.

It is time you start believing your spouse when they tell you how attractive they think you are. Let them define what true beauty is.

Wear Something That You Feel Sexy In

Pick out clothing or lingerie that will boost your self-confidence. Start by wearing outfits that will help you feel good about yourself. I’m particularly talking about lingerie or other special outfits just for your spouse.

Find something that is revealing and sexy but makes you feel comfortable. As you and your spouse spend time together while you wear sensual clothing, it will help you feel more at ease with your body. Try to make it a point to wear something revealing a few nights a week after your kids go to bed.

Lay Under the Covers With Nothing On

Ready to graduate out of sensual clothes and into your birthday suit? A great way to make that transition is to get fully undressed and lay under the covers with your spouse. This will give them the opportunity to touch you without clothes on.

At the same time, you will feel more relaxed and comfortable being naked with them. As time moves on, you can start feeling more comfortable pulling the covers back. The more time you spend undressed around your spouse, the easier it will become.

Undressed and Unashamed

Being fully naked next to your spouse is a bonding experience that brings you closer together. It is important that you embrace this time with your loved one. We read in Genesis that Adam and Eve were fully exposed and unashamed. It wasn’t until sin entered the world that they felt the shame of their unclothed bodies.

We see that when they were in a perfect relationship, they were undressed and unashamed. While we are no longer perfect, being undressed and unashamed in a marriage relationship is important.

Keelie Reason

Keelie Reason

Keelie is a mother of three amazing boys and married to her high school sweetheart, Austin. She spends her days running R5 Website Management, taking care of the home, and investing in her children. In her spare time, she loves to encourage married couples to grow deeper in their relationship and find joy in their marriage.

This article was reposted and used with permission from Love Hope Adventure


Looking for a fun way to spice up your relationship and sex life? Check out the amazing Ultimate Intimacy App! It’s Free to download so what are you waiting for?


The "Ultimate" Newsletter
Subscribe to our newsletter for weekly marriage tips, printables, and updates on the app and products!
Sign up for FREE:
*No spam, we promise.