You can also listen to episode 100 titled “If You Want To Make Love To Me You Have To First Make Love To Me In The Kitchen”
How does a man interpret this? Well a man would probably say jokingly “I would love to make love to you in the kitchen.” But all women reading this knows what this means. “Making Love” starts early in the day and isn’t about just having sex. We did a poll on instagram and asked the Ultimate Intimacy audience some great questions to find out what most couples think. Here are the questions we asked and the answers which surprised us.
Husbands, does your wife think you want to make love too often?
57% said yes, 43% said no
That answer is pretty awesome! We would have expected most of them to say that they think their wife would say they want to make love too often.
If Your wife says making love starts in the kitchen, what does that mean to you?
- Pay attention to her before we get to the bedroom.
- It’s more than just physical.
- We need to be helpful in other things before thinking of the bedroom.
- You have to do the prep work and time the time to heat thing up before you can sit down to eat.
- Help her with housework.
- Helping around the house.
We had TONS of answers, but you can see from the theme is that women want their husbands to think about them before sex and alot of men get that. They want to have help around the house, pay attention to them and show them that they love them, not just when it’s time to have sex.
If husbands spend more time helping their wives with things around the house, spending more time with them outside the bedroom and showing them how much they appreciate them, that will lead to the bedroom. Physical intimacy starts with emotional intimacy.
Wives, do you think your husband wants sex too often?
27% said yes, 43% said no
WOW! This is low! Maybe husbands should be intimating more often? Or maybe the wive’s should be initiating more often?
Wives, What do you think when you hear the phrase “making love in the kitchen?”
- Connections starts with conversation and daily interaction.
- It takes time and ingredients to get to the final dish.
- Husband helping with cooking and cleaning and dishes.
- Means he has to get me warm first.
- It’s easier to be intimate if I fell like we are a team in other areas of life and if I feel supported.
- Intimacy isn’t what happens in the bedroom! It’s all the little things that lead up to that.
Husbands, what is the one thing you want from your wife?
- I want to be wanted.
- To be noticed.
- Connection. To know she is thinking about me.
- More lingerie.
- Her attention.
- Love and acceptance.
- For her to love sex.
- More foreplay.
- Open conversations about desires and wants.
- To feel needed, wanted, respected and pursued.
Wives, what is the one thing you want from your husband?
- Just want his attention.
- More romance.
- To be cherished.
- Pay attention to me, talk to me and hug me.
- More quality time.
- Time to ourselves.
- Teamwork in all areas.
- Time to focus on each other.
So what do men really want?
A man want’s his wife to pay more attention to him.
Life gets so busy and often women are so consumed with running the kids around, things around the house, dinner, activities etc and by the end of the day, they are just worn out. Men just want to be acknowledged and feel needed in the relationship.
A man doesn’t want to be criticized or corrected.
This doesn’t mean that things can’t be pointed out as needed, but a man is confident when he knows he is appreciated and his wife pays him compliments. Instead of focusing and nagging your man for all the things he doesn’t do, or falls short with, express to him the things you are grateful for that he does do and how much you appreciate him.
He would love to hear “Thank you” more often.
Saying thank you to your man will go along way and let him know you love and appreciate him.
He want’s to make love to you.. often!
Although most men do not come out and say it (for fear of rejection), the physical connection your husband craves with you helps him create the emotional connection that YOU want from him. When a man feels rejected from a physical relationship, he will start to feel insecure in the relationship as a whole and wonder if you love him.
Sex is how husbands connect with their wives both physically and emotionally. Whether right or wrong in a woman’s eyes, this is how a man is wired.
He want’s YOU (his wife) to enjoy sex!
For most men, good sex is not about achieving an orgasm. Men are extremely turned on and gratified when they see sex being enjoyed by their wife. It is important for men to have their wive’s fully involved in the experience and enjoying being intimate together.
He hates guessing what you want in and out of the bedroom.
Men are not good at reading minds. Women often think a man should know what they want or what they are thinking but men aren’t that smart. Just tell your husband what you want in and out of the bedroom and he will fulfill those needs. Yes, it really is just that easy. Sometimes you may need to remind him :). Men truly do want to make their wives happy but sometimes just need to be told what that looks like.
So what do women really want?
Romance! Tell them they are beautiful. Compliment them. Your wife wants to hear compliments!
They want to be touched… and not just when you want sex. For men, anytime their wife touches them, they immediately think their wife is in the mood for sex :). Also, men often start touching their spouse and get in the mood for sex that way as well. Bottom line is men associate physical touch as leading to sex. But for women, they want to be touched far before sex. They want to hold hands, hug, kiss and cuddle together without it always having to lead to sex.
They want to be appreciated for all they do. Women do so much more than men think. They run the kids around, take care of the house, chores, laundry, dinner, and so many other things. Show your wife how much you appreciate all they do by expressing it to them.
They want their man to know their love language and express love to them in that language. Many couples don’t realize how important this actually is. If a woman feels loved by quality time, but her husband is not spending quality time with her, no matter how much he loves her, she is not going to feel that love. This goes both ways but typically for men, their love language is physical touch (sex) so no secret there.
Get to know your wife’s love language and express your love to her in that way.
A wife wants to be talked to and treated with respect. It is amazing how many men talk to their spouse as if they are another buddy/friend. This is not how your wife wants to be talked to or treated. Treat your wife with respect in the way to talk to her and the things you do. THAT is how she will know you love her.
She wants to be prioritized before work, hobbies and friends. Some men spend so much time working, with friends and doing their hobbies and neglect time spent with their spouse. Your time with your wife will send a clear message about how much you love and prioritize her. Time = Love.
Whether you want to make love in the kitchen, bedroom or wherever… and if you want to have better emotional intimacy in your marriage, then check out the #1 marriage and intimacy app Ultimate Intimacy! It’s FREE to download and so much fun! Just click on the picture below to download for free today!