In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to get caught up in the demands of parenting and lose sight of the importance of nurturing your marriage. Many couples prioritize their children over their relationship, believing that this is the right thing to do. However, this can actually be detrimental to both your marriage and your children.
This is one are there is ALOT of contention. When we ask poll questions or do videos or podcasts on this subject, it is a very contentious subject and amazing how many spouses prioritize their kids over their marriage… and they wonder why their marriage suffers.
Check out a great podcast episode 54. Want A Better Marriage? Your Kids Can’t Come First
In this blog post, we’ll explore why you shouldn’t put your kids before your spouse.
Your marriage is the foundation of your family
Your marriage is the foundation on which your family is built. A strong, healthy marriage sets the tone for your children’s emotional well-being and stability. When you prioritize your relationship with your spouse, you’re modeling a healthy relationship for your children to emulate. They’ll learn how to communicate, compromise, and show affection in a way that will serve them well in their own relationships.
Your kids need to see what a healthy and happy marriage looks like so they can have the same thing when they grow up. They will emulate wha they see!
Neglecting your marriage can lead to resentment
If you constantly put your children’s needs before your spouse, it can create feelings of resentment and neglect. Your spouse may feel that they’re always “last on your list,” and this can breed feelings of frustration and anger. Over time, these negative emotions can erode the foundation of your marriage, making it harder to connect and communicate when the kids finally are out of the house. Many couples are going to find out it may be too late.
A happy marriage makes for happier children
Children are incredibly perceptive and can pick up on even the subtlest of emotions between their parents. When your marriage is thriving, your children will sense it, and it will have a positive impact on their own emotional well-being. Studies have shown that children who grow up in households with happy, connected parents are more likely to be well-adjusted and emotionally stable.
Show your kids what a happy marriage looks like! Show affection, show that your marriage is a priority and they will likely do the same and prioritize their marriage when they get married.
Check out a great article “Why a good healthy marriage is so important for your kids.”
Your children will grow up and leave
While it may seem like your children will be with you forever, the truth is that they’ll grow up and leave the nest sooner than you think. When that day comes, you’ll be left with your spouse, and it’s important to have a strong, fulfilling relationship to fall back on. Neglecting your marriage while your children are young can leave you feeling disconnected and lonely once they’re gone.
The divorce rate actually goes higher when kids move out of the house. If couples are not connected it can be very hard on them when the kids leave, especially when the kids have always come first.
Your spouse deserves your love and attention
Finally, your spouse deserves your love and attention just as much as your children do. They’re your partner in life, and they’ve committed to being by your side through thick and thin. Neglecting your marriage in favor of your children can make your spouse feel unappreciated and undervalued. Remember, your relationship with your spouse is just as (if not more) important as your relationship with your children.
In conclusion, putting your kids before your spouse may seem like the right thing to do, but it can actually be detrimental to your family in the long run. Your marriage is the foundation of your family, and neglecting it can lead to resentment, a lack of emotional well-being, and a sense of loneliness once your children leave the nest.
By prioritizing your relationship with your spouse, you’re modeling a healthy relationship for your children to emulate, creating a more stable and emotionally fulfilling household. Remember, your spouse deserves your love and attention just as much as your children do.
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