05 Jan

Sex Is A Thermometer That Can Gauge The Temperature In Your Marriage

Why do men and women get married? Because they want to share their life with someone they love in a very intimate way. This happens through both emotional intimacy and sexual intimacy. In this post, we are going to talk about how sexual intimacy is a thermometer that can gauge the temperature of your marriage.

Most couples don’t realize the importance of sexual intimacy in their marriage and the impact it can have in either a positive or negative way. Sexual intimacy is vital (for most marriages) to having a high level of satisfaction in the relationship. Does the overall happiness and satisfaction in a marital relationship really correlate with how much sex you’re having? The answer for the majority of couples is yes!

Sexual intimacy is so profound and special because we are at our most vulnerable point with our spouse. Also, sexual intimacy is the only type of intimacy we don’t experience with anyone else other than our spouse. It requires extreme vulnerability, trust, and unselfishness between a couple. It is a private experience where we get to see it all! All the perfections, imperfections and being at our most vulnerable point. Because of this, for couples that have a good relationship, there is no deeper and more intimate and powerful way to connect than through sexual intimacy.

Sexual intimacy and overall satisfaction in marriage do go hand in hand. Couples that have good sexual intimacy where both spouses are satisfied typically have very happy and satisfying marriages. Couples that have infrequent sexual intimacy are much more likely to feel disconnected and end up in divorce.

There is a reason that the at the top cause of divorce is due to sexual intimacy issues (or lack of it) in the relationship.

So is sex in your marriage really a good indicator of the temperature of, or how good (or bad) your marriage is? 

We did a social media poll to over 60,000 people and here are the responses.

1. Does sex play an important role in your happiness?

92% YES

8% NO

2. When your marriage is good, are you having more sex?

91% YES

9% NO

So the answer is simple, Yes sex can gauge how good your marriage is. Couples that have a good marriages are having more sex and more sex means a better marriage, so sex can be a great indicator as to the temperature of your marriage.

As we have talked about in so many previous articles and podcasts, there are so many excuses and reasons people give for not having frequent sexual intimacy, not understanding the damage that is being caused to their relationship.

A lot of couples also use sex as a weapon against their spouse hoping it will force them to provide something or make a change in the relationship. This can also be a very dangerous and sometimes fatal to the relationship. If you are one of these couples, you will want to check out a previous podcast we did titled 116. Is This Toxic Emotional And Sexual Intimacy Game Being Played In Your Marriage?

Why do couples have such a hard time getting on the same page when it comes to sexual intimacy?

Most women need the emotional connection before having a physical connection with their husband. And for most men, they need to have the physical connection before they will feel safe enough for the emotional vulnerability and connection.

So for MANY marriages it looks like this: 

The wife withhold’s sexual intimacy from her husband (and sometimes uses it as a weapon) as a punishment because she feels he is not fulfilling her emotional needs. 

The husband is usually upset and withdraws even further from her because he doesn’t feel loved. He won’t meet his wife’s emotional needs because his wife won’t meet the physical needs in the relationship (because a husband needs the physical connection first). 

In this sad situations, both spouses are VERY unsatisfied and unhappy and often couples just grow further apart and either have very unhappy marriages, or end in divorce.

In life, there are many things we do (not because we necessarily want to), but because we know they are important to staying healthy and happy. Sexual intimacy in our marriage should be one of those things.

You may also want to check out our article What is maintenance sex and why is it important?

So is sex really a thermometer that can gauge the temperature of your marriage? The answer is clearly yes for most marriages. So if you want a happier marriage, you should strive to have more sexual intimacy as a couple because chances are, if you are having more sexual intimacy together, you are going to be happier in your marriage.

Ultimate Intimacy


Looking for more emotional and sexual intimacy in your marriage? Want to spice things up in the bedroom? Then check out the best marriage app on the market with over 500,000 downloads and a 4.8/5 star rating in the App Store! The Ultimate Intimacy App is free to download so what are you waiting for. Just click on the picture below.

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