17 Nov

It’s no secret that men and women experience sexual intimacy differently. For many couples, this divergence in how it feels can lead to challenges in the bedroom. Men often find pleasure throughout the entire sexual encounter, while for women, it may only last for about 30 seconds or so.

This fundamental difference can be a significant factor in why your wife doesn’t crave sexual intimacy as frequently as you do. Sex takes time, work and preparation for many couples so if a wife is only enjoying it for a few seconds, that may not feel like it’s worth the time and effort.

Let’s delve into this fascinating aspect of human sexuality and explore how using aids like vibrators can make a significant difference.

The Pleasure Gap

Men and women have distinct sexual responses. For men, the entire sexual experience can be pleasurable from start to finish. But for women, it’s not quite the same. The climax, often considered the most pleasurable part of sex, lasts for a mere fraction of the total time.

This fundamental discrepancy can lead to women not feeling as motivated to engage in sexual activity as frequently as their husband does.

This is not to say that women don’t enjoy sex. Most probably do, but it’s essential to understand that their pleasure is concentrated during a relatively short period, and for many women, this might not be sufficient motivation to prioritize sexual intimacy regularly.

This is something that we talk about in depth in a recent podcast episode we did titled: Could This Be A Big Reason Why Your Wife Doesn’t Crave Being Sexually Intimate As Often As You Do?

We men drive ourselves crazy wondering why our wives don’t crave sexual intimacy as much as we do! After all, most of us are good-looking, romantic, great fathers, and awesome husbands! It’s baffling how they can keep their hands off of us!

In one of our recent conversations, Amy dropped a truth bomb about one of the reasons she doesn’t crave intimacy as much as I (Nick) do. Her explanation made total sense to me, and we found a great solution. We agreed that we needed to do a podcast and share it with you!

So, if you’re a husband who can’t figure out why your wife doesn’t crave intimacy like you do, or if you’re a wife who feels the same way Amy did, you need to listen to this episode. We discuss the reasons why your wife might not crave sexual intimacy as often as you do, AND we talk about things you can do to increase your chances of enjoying more intimate moments.

Amy and I had a great discussion talking about why she thinks women in general don’t crave sexual intimacy as much as we men do which let to a long conversation which mades sense! If something takes a lot of preparation, time and energy and only feels good for a few seconds vs something that feels good to a husband for the whole time, would that make sense why some women don’t crave being intimacy as often?

This prompted a good discussion and Amy shared that when we are using a sexual tool such as a vibrator or ring it feels good the entire time and makes sexual intimacy much more enjoyable for her.

So many people are scared to try different things that could ultimately be a “game changer” for their marriage. We were one of these couples for many years, but after getting comfortable with using it to enhance our intimate experience together, it has been a total game changer for us.

So, what can couples do to bridge this pleasure gap and create a more satisfying and mutually enjoyable sexual experience?

Introducing Aids Like Vibrators

One effective solution is the use of aids, such as vibrators. While the idea of incorporating a sex toy may seem unconventional, it can be a game-changer for couples looking to enhance their intimate life. It was for us.

Vibrators can provide women with additional stimulation and help them experience more intense pleasure, which can lead to an increased desire for sexual intimacy.

It’s crucial to emphasize that the use of aids like vibrators is not about replacing your spouse, but about enhancing the overall experience and creating a more fulfilling connection.

How Vibrators Can Help

  1. Extended Pleasure: Vibrators can provide women with prolonged pleasure, aligning more closely with their spouse’s experience. This can help women enjoy sex more and increase their motivation for intimate moments.
  2. Enhanced Connection: Using a vibrator with your spouse can lead to a more profound connection, as it demonstrates your willingness to prioritize their pleasure. It can foster trust, communication, and emotional intimacy.
  3. Reducing Pressure: Some women may feel pressured to climax quickly during sex, which can be stressful and counterproductive. Vibrators allow for a more relaxed and enjoyable experience, removing the anxiety associated with performance.
  4. Exploration and Experimentation: Introducing aids like vibrators can also lead to exploration and experimentation in the bedroom, making your sexual encounters more exciting and varied.

You can also try a vibrating ring which also applies vibration to the clitoris while making love.

Open Communication Is Key

Before introducing any aids into your sexual relationship, open and honest communication is paramount. Discuss your desires and concerns with your spouse, and ensure that you both feel comfortable and willing to explore these options together. It’s not about replacing one another; it’s about enriching your shared experience.

If you are a women who has a hard time having an orgasm, or who has never had one, you are not alone. Here is a great article titled: Hard time having an orgasm? Try these 6 things.

In conclusion, understanding the differences in how men and women experience pleasure during sexual intimacy can shed light on why your wife may not always crave sex as frequently as you do.

By being aware of this distinction and considering the use of aids like vibrators, couples can take significant steps toward creating a more satisfying and harmonious sexual connection. Ultimately, it’s all about enhancing your intimate life and deepening your bond as a couple.

Ultimate Intimacy


Check out the #1 marriage and intimacy app on the market that is “Christian Friendly” called Ultimate Intimacy. The app has hundreds of articles, resources, bedroom games, Sex positions (iPhone only), intimate chat, and so much more! Find out it has such a high rating and has been downloaded by over 650,000 people!

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