05 Apr

If you have followed us for a while, you know our view on sex toys in the bedroom have COMPLETELY changed. We were against them for such a long time.. that is until we tried them and realized what our intimacy was missing 🙂

In this article, we are going to dive into the intricacies of this conversation, exploring the potential benefits and drawbacks of incorporating sex toys into your intimate life.

Here is a fantastic podcast where we talked about this very subject titled: 250. The Negatives And Positives About Adding Sex Toys To The Bedroom.

Growing up, we thought sex toys were for couples or individuals who were into crazy things in the bedroom. We had a very negative view on them.. that is until we tried them. And wow were we wrong! Now we are HUGE proponents of intimacy aids (or sex toys) if used the right way together.

Sex aids and toys can be a great way to explore and learn about each others bodies, connect on a deeper level, and make sexual intimacy amazing for both spouses. Yes, women, you can enjoy sexual intimacy as much or more as your husband with a little bit of help!

But having said that, there can also be some negatives about introducing sex toys into your relationship if you are not careful. 

In this episode, we discuss the negatives and positives about adding sex toys to the bedroom and help you determine if they are right for you!

The Negatives

Dependency: Over-reliance on sex toys, particularly vibrators, can lead to dependency, potentially inhibiting natural arousal and intimacy between a couple. It’s crucial to maintain a balance and ensure that toys complement rather than replace intimacy.

Performance Pressure: Introducing toys into the bedroom may create pressure on one or both spouses to perform or meet certain standards, leading to feelings of inadequacy or disappointment. It’s important to remember that sexual pleasure isn’t solely reliant on achieving specific goals or outcomes.

Emotional Distance: Excessive focus on physical pleasure through toys can result in emotional disconnection between a couple, weakening the emotional intimacy in the relationship. Couples should prioritize communication and ensure that emotional connection remains a central aspect of their sexual encounters.

Communication Barriers: Relying solely on toys for sexual satisfaction without open communication about desires and preferences can hinder effective communication and intimacy in the relationship. Honest and open communication is key to ensuring that both of you feel heard and understood.

Impact on Self-Esteem: Feeling replaced or inadequate due to the use of toys may negatively impact self-esteem and confidence within the relationship. This is a concern Nick had. It’s essential for spouses to reassure each other and prioritize emotional support.

Relationship Imbalance: Differences in desire or interest in using toys can create tension or imbalance in the relationship, potentially leading to resentment or conflict. Couples should strive for mutual understanding and compromise to address any disparities.

Privacy Concerns: Lack of privacy or discretion around the use of toys may cause discomfort or embarrassment, especially if not discussed or agreed upon by both spouses. Establishing clear boundaries and respecting each other’s comfort levels is crucial.

The Positives

Enhanced Pleasure: Sex toys can enhance sexual pleasure and exploration, allowing couples to discover new sensations and experiences together. This was our experience as well and our intimacy has become better than we ever thought possible.

Check out some of the amazing sex toys we offer through our shop!

Increased Intimacy: Sharing and exploring toys together can deepen intimacy and trust between a couple, fostering greater emotional connection.

Mutual Satisfaction: Toys can help ensure both couples experience satisfaction and pleasure, regardless of differences in libido or sexual preferences.

Spicing Up Routine: Introducing toys into the bedroom can add excitement and variety to sexual encounters, helping to prevent monotony or boredom.

For other great ways to spice things up in the bedroom, check out the amazing Ultimate Intimacy App!

Exploration and Experimentation: Using toys encourages couples to explore their bodies and desires, promoting sexual experimentation and openness within the relationship.

Communication Tool: Discussing preferences, fantasies, and boundaries around toy use can facilitate open communication and strengthen the couple’s bond.

Stress Reduction: Engaging in intimate activities with toys can reduce stress and tension, promoting relaxation and overall well-being within the marriage. Did you know one of the reasons the vibrator was invented is to help with stress?

Equalizing Power Dynamics: Using toys can help level the playing field in terms of pleasure and control, empowering both spouses to actively participate and enjoy sexual encounters.

Educational Opportunity: Experimenting with toys allows couples to learn more about each other’s bodies and sexual responses, leading to deeper understanding and connection.

Fun and Playfulness: Incorporating toys into sexual play can bring a sense of fun, playfulness, and adventure to the bedroom, enhancing overall relationship satisfaction.

In conclusion, if you haven’t tried implementing a sex toy into your love making, you should talk about it together as a couple and give some things a try. There are many great toys that can be used together as a couple to make the experience amazing for both spouses! We feel the positives much out weigh the negatives if used right together.

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