06 Nov

Check out our amazing podcast episode: 206. Amazing Emotional And Sexual Intimacy Is Built On Being Vulnerable.

When it comes to love and relationships, one thread stands out as essential: vulnerability. It’s the raw, unfiltered connection that makes intimacy truly amazing. It’s about baring your soul, embracing imperfections, and allowing your spouse to see the real you. But why is vulnerability so crucial, and how can you cultivate it in your marriage?

Let’s dive into the art of being vulnerable.

Why You Need to Be Vulnerable

Vulnerability is the bridge that connects hearts and souls in a marriage. It’s the cornerstone of emotional intimacy and trust. Here’s why it’s indispensable:

  1. Build Trust: Trust is the bedrock of vulnerability. Open communication, honesty, and reliability create a strong foundation of trust. When you trust your spouse, you’re more willing to open up and share your deepest emotions.
  2. Create a Safe and Judgment-Free Environment: To be vulnerable, you need a safe space in your marriage. This means accepting your spouse without criticism or judgment. Love and acceptance should permeate your relationship, allowing you both to be truly yourselves.
  3. Self-Awareness: Before you can be vulnerable with your spouse, you need to understand yourself deeply. Self-awareness is the key to unlocking your emotions and fears.
  4. Start with Small Steps: Being vulnerable doesn’t mean you have to dive into your deepest secrets immediately. Start by sharing less sensitive topics or minor concerns. This will help you gauge your spouse’s response and gradually work your way up to more profound emotions and experiences.
  5. Active Listening: Encourage your spouse to share their thoughts and feelings with you. When they do, listen actively. Show empathy and understanding to create a nurturing environment for vulnerability.

Ways to Be Vulnerable

Now, let’s explore practical ways to cultivate vulnerability in your marriage:

  1. Use “I” Statements: When expressing yourself, use “I” statements to communicate your emotions and needs. For example, say, “I feel scared when…” instead of “You always make me feel…”
  2. Be Completely Honest: Share your feelings, even if they are difficult or uncomfortable. Honesty is the key to vulnerability.
  3. Share Your Dreams and Fears: Discuss your deepest dreams, aspirations, and fears with your spouse. This can help you both connect on a profound level.
  4. Express Gratitude and Appreciation: Let your spouse know how much you appreciate and love them. Express your gratitude for their presence in your life.
  5. Seek Professional Help: Marriage counseling or therapy can provide a structured and safe environment for both partners to be extremely vulnerable and work through issues.
  6. Accept Imperfections: Recognize that neither you nor your spouse is perfect. Embrace each other’s flaws and imperfections as part of what makes you unique.
  7. Practice Empathy: Try to see things from your spouse’s perspective and validate their emotions, even if you don’t fully understand or agree with them.
  8. Be Patient: Building extreme vulnerability takes time, so be patient with yourself and your spouse as you both work on opening up more.
  9. Regular Check-Ins: Schedule regular conversations with your spouse to discuss your relationship, feelings, and any concerns or changes you’d like to make.
  10. Apologize and Forgive: When conflicts arise, be willing to apologize if you’re in the wrong, and forgive your spouse when they make mistakes. Holding onto grudges can hinder vulnerability.
  11. Share Intimate Moments: Physical intimacy can also be a form of vulnerability. Be open and communicative about your desires and needs in the bedroom.
  12. Celebrate Vulnerability: Acknowledge and celebrate moments of extreme vulnerability in your marriage. Recognize the strength it takes to be open and honest with each other.

In conclusion, vulnerability is the magic that makes intimacy amazing. It’s the willingness to be your authentic selves, to share your dreams and fears, and to create a safe haven of love and acceptance.

By embracing vulnerability, your marriage can flourish, and your connection can deepen beyond your wildest dreams. So, take that courageous step toward true intimacy and experience the beauty of a vulnerable, loving partnership.

Ultimate Intimacy


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