There are many toxic games couples play in marriage and is important to recognize that some dynamics and behaviors within relationships can be toxic. These toxic games can negatively impact a couple’s emotional well-being, communication, and overall happiness.
In this article, we will shed light on some common toxic games that couples play in marriage, emphasizing the need for open and honest communication in the marriage.
- The Blame Game:
In this game, couples engage in a constant cycle of blame and deflection, often avoiding taking responsibility for their actions or shortcomings. Instead of addressing issues constructively, they engage in a pattern of finger-pointing, leading to resentment and an erosion of trust.
It is crucial for couples to adopt a more compassionate approach, focusing on problem-solving and personal growth rather than assigning blame.
- Emotional Manipulation:
Emotional manipulation is a toxic game where one spouse uses guilt, fear, or other tactics to control or manipulate the other’s emotions and actions. This can involve threats, passive-aggressive behavior, or withholding affection as a means of getting what they want.
Healthy relationships require open communication and mutual respect, rather than manipulative tactics that erode trust and intimacy.
- The Silent Treatment:
Silence can be deafening in a marriage when used as a tool to punish or manipulate. The silent treatment involves one spouse withdrawing emotionally, refusing to communicate or engage in meaningful conversation, leaving the other feeling ignored and invalidated.
Instead of playing this destructive game, couples should strive for active communication, addressing concerns and resolving conflicts through respectful dialogue.
- Keeping Score:
A detrimental game often played in marriages is keeping score, where spouses keep a mental tally of each other’s perceived wrongdoings or imbalances in responsibilities. This game fosters an unhealthy competitive atmosphere and undermines the spirit of teamwork and support.
Couples should focus on open communication, compromise, and shared responsibilities to foster a balanced and harmonious relationship.
When you start keeping score, no one ever wins.
Check out our great blog post: Are toxic emotional and sexual intimacy games being played in your marriage?
Recognizing and addressing these destructive patterns is vital for cultivating a supportive and loving partnership. Couples must prioritize open and honest communication, empathy, and mutual respect to foster a strong foundation built on trust and understanding.
By abandoning toxic games and embracing healthier alternatives, couples can nurture a relationship that thrives on love, growth, and happiness.
You may also like this amazing podcast titled: 116. Is This Toxic Emotional And Sexual Intimacy Game Being Played In Your Marriage?
We recently did a video on social media for the men titled “the reasons your wife doesn’t want to make love to you.” We have heard a lot of the women state it is because their emotional needs are not being met. In one of the comments from the video, a husband stated:
“A man’s emotional needs are linked to his wife making love to him, which she won’t do unless her emotional needs are met first, Thus the man becomes responsible for his and his wife’s emotional needs.”This was a powerful statement which caused us to do this podcast, and reflect on this in our marriage as well.
Most women want an emotional connection before having a physical connection with their husband. And for most men, they need to have the physical connection before they will feel safe enough for the emotional vulnerability and connection with their wife.
So for MANY marriages it looks like this:
The wife will withhold sexual intimacy (and sometimes use it as a weapon) as a punishment to try to get the emotional intimacy she wants from her husband.
The husband is usually upset and doesn’t meet his wife’s emotional needs because his wife won’t meet the physical needs in the relationship (because a husband needs the physical connection first).
Sound familiar? This toxic game is played in many relationships.. and in this game, no one ever wins and the marriage suffers from it, many times ending in divorce. In this episode, we discuss the games that are played and the things couples can do to get both of their needs met so they can have a fulfilling marriage.
Ultimate Intimacy
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